As i type this I'm caressed by the cool breeze that whisper of the storm that is soon to follow...i feel a lot empty inside...my niece has gone back home or the next few days to be with her parents and here i am feeling a lot lost.. i don't know which one is better..cribbing that she practically sleeps all over me ensuring that i have a eventful night battling her kicks and snuggles.. or miss the warmest of hugs i get before i finally succumb to sleep.. since she came to live with me with measles life is no longer the same...my room has been taken over..even my cupboards captured but strangely today almost 4 months to the date..i feel so accomplished and so peaceful.. because with her mere presence Roshni [my niece] just calms me down and fills colour to my life... inventing a new name everyday, or scurrying home, or surprising her with little somethings every time i return home, to those delightful melting moments when delighted by the money i give her she runs to the shop near by for her favourite ice-cream to those sneaky chocolate sessions... these now seems such an integral part of my life.. i wonder what i am to do if i am to leave the city.. or how she is going to survive once i am gone.. :) kids are such darlings i tell you.. to have such darlings I'm ready to overcome my phobia about giving birth it really is worth it...
ICSE results were declared today and my student fared really well and i feel so proud of her. We started of being teacher and student but at the end of an year I'm her mentor and then her friend. Knowing the mental conditions she was going through from almost every quarter of life, its a miracle she did so well.. and i am one happy teacher.. it feels great finally to see something you gave life to become successful it is one hell of a accomplished feeling... Congratulations Sushmita!! here's to newer shores and broader horizons!! Cheers!! :)
I have been having pretty harrowing time.. with a range of emotions changing with rapid succession.. fear, anger,depression,hope,anger, happiness and despair and hope again..not it is not just PMS but life for sure...i feel i have aged manifold in the month..i could have broken down in despair and given up the fight but i choose not to, i took risks.. i did whatever i could to nurse my dream and see it to completion... the rest.. is on God and what he wants to fashion my life...but whatever it is.. i am ready...i am ready to give it my best, to dare to dream, to achieve and face the verdict whatever it maybe...
After more than a year of despair... there is a glimmer of hope...prayers maybe answered..labour may just be rewarded... *keeping my finger crossed* may peace and prosperity be restored, may the good times come, and are here to stay..
the storm clouds seems to have been blown away... literally soo.. :( so this is to be a rain-less night! sigh! damn! yes now i must get back to my books... tadaaa :)
